Body safe

Body safe

About 25 women gather every morning at sunrise for an hour-long walk. An outside observer of this meeting would have no idea what connects the two-time triathlete from Los Angeles with the psychologist from Kansas or the fitness trainer from Baltimore.

But since 1996, this group of women from across America have forwarded phone calls and emails, kissed their loved ones goodbye, and then headed out of town to cleanse their minds and hearts for four days in Shape's Body Confident (formerly known as Body Positive) program. The goal of the four days? To enable women to transform their body images.

Shape's Body Confident, which launched in 1996, is about how women feel about themselves and their bodies and how to amplify those feelings. A typical day includes interactive discussions on topics related to body image, exercise (from spinning to hiking to yoga), learning relaxation techniques, and listening to speakers on topics such as sexuality, nutrition, and fitness.

The morning begins with a group walk or an extensive hike. The participants then meet for a group discussion, which is led by the psychologist and body image expert Ann Kearney-Coke, Ph.D., director of the Cincinnati Psychiatric Institute. Most alumnae say that they feel the synergy and openness of women who have experienced similar struggles with their body image than the most valuable part of the program. Women relate to feelings that range from shame, guilt and anger to hope, joy and self -acceptance.

Since the experiences of women from former anorexics to compulsive athletes or eating addicts extend, everyone can identify with someone in the group. And by visualizing and promoting the individual diary letter, visualizing and promoting group discussions, it helps these women to identify their concerns and to examine specific behaviors that maintain the negativity towards their body. It also presents a step-by-step strategy to re-draw a healthier body image that the participants can take home with them.

Does Body Confidence Work? This is a question perhaps best answered by the women who have been returning for years. As you'll see when you read some of the alumnae's impressive testimonials, the real challenge they all face goes deeper than their bodies. This challenge is to feel better about who they are. Here's what happened to them in the year after their first Body Confident seminars - and how Body Confident played a significant role in bringing about those changes.

"I came out of my depression."

- Julie Robinson, Los Angeles

In 1996, Robinson attended the first-ever Body Confident session, which took place shortly after her mother's death. “My mother’s death brought me to rock bottom because I realized I couldn’t enjoy her childhood or mine,” she says. “I couldn’t help myself anymore and had to change my life.”

Robinson left her first body confident seminar with the vows, her mind, her body and soul. In particular, she wanted to work on her lack of self -confidence and chronic light depression, properties that she shared with her late mother. Robinson says that the program made it possible for her to get out of depression by showing her how she could steep away energy from her physical obsessions. "When I stopped taking care of my appearance, there was so much in life that I could let in and enjoy. After Body Confident, I recognized this part of myself, which has fire and desire," she enthuses. "I'm no longer afraid in the way. This initiative was there all the time, but I didn't see it because I was involved in depression."

Robinson took measures by organizing a book club to promote your thoughts and build a better support system. Physically, she decided to set more specific goals than going to the gym five days a week. So she trained with a friend and completed a triathlon in 1997. Then, a year after she took part in her second Body Confident workshop, she crossed the finish line of a 560-mile-AIDS bike tour from San Francisco to Los Angeles.

Robinson later closed the circle of her mother's death in her recovery. She informed other participants in Tucson a posthumous letter that she had written to her mother. "My letter to my mother tells her about all the things that I have fun now," explains Robinson. "I have reached a point in my life that I didn't have with her. I can now give my children the joie de vivre because I have it myself."

"The more I believed in myself, the more I felt like I could take care of myself and the more I felt like my body wasn't so bad."

-Mary Jo Castor, Baltimore

Castor had known for years that something was wrong with her body image. "Every time I looked in the mirror, I only saw two fat thighs," she recalls. "I went to Body Confident because I had to get into my body."

In a magazine from 1997, Castor, a lifelong fitness lawyer, reported eloquent about her fear, when she dealt with questions of the body image and the resulting advantages at her first body confident: "[The Program] was my springboard in the center of life. It became clear to me that my body feelings had nothing to do with my body. First breath and look around, everything appears clean and fresh and new. ”

Castor's first step was to "pay more attention to what I wanted to do and less about what others wanted me to do," she says, recalling Kearney-Cooke's advice to focus on her own needs — even if it meant taking time away from family and friends for a while. Castor consulted a nutritionist, and today she works out regularly with her husband, eats healthier and focuses on the new woman she has discovered.

When Castor hits a mirror these days, she probably overlooks these thighs. "I'm going to pass that now," she says. "Most of the time I see that I'm really strong."

“I started cycling.”

- Beth McGilley, Ph.D., Wichita, Kan.

The youngest of five children, McGilley lost her mother to suicide when McGilley was just 16 years old. “Being the hero child was my role,” she says of the years before and after her mother’s suicide. “I’ve been a helper and a caretaker and carried loads for everyone else, so I shouldn’t lack for much.”

The Body Confident workshop, along with therapy, has allowed McGilley to prioritize herself. When another Body Confident participant saw her in a spin class in 1997 and suggested she try cycling, McGilley quickly jumped on the idea. “I had been giving too much and not caring about my own life, so one of my goals was to be conscious about cycling,” she says.

After the training, McGilley joined a local team in Wichita and took part in her first race in Oklahoma City. "Cycling races offered me a medium to cope with the challenges of life, including the emotional experiences that I had to confront with my recent divorce," she says. "To drive against wind speeds of 20 to 30 miles per hour gives you the feeling of knowing your means - to go beyond a place that you didn't think you could reach it. Cycling gave me a stronger feeling for my body and myself."

In her first cycling race in 1998, McGilley placed fourth in the road portion of a three-part stage race. She has been racing ever since.

“I decided to run a half marathon.”

- Arlene lance, Plainsboro, NJ

"To be honest, I didn't expect to get anything out of the program. I just wanted to go to a spa," Lance says of taking part in Body Confident in 1997. "Luckily, it was a lot more than I expected."

Lance remembers SHAPE's editor-in-chief, Barbara Harris, motivating the group by telling them, "Love your body for what it can do for you."

“That inspired me,” Lance remembers. "I always felt like I had subpar physical abilities, and I felt pretty weak physically. So at that first Body Confident workshop, I really pushed myself: I ran. I did spinning. I took three exercise classes. It felt good and it built my confidence."

When she returned to New Jersey, Lance decided to train especially for the half marathon. "I did it, 13.1 miles, in Philadelphia," she reports. "Since I've been training and participating in competitions, I feel better. I'm more athletic, stronger. I see my body than what it can do for me."

That trust has seeped into other areas of Lance's life. “At my first Body Confident seminar, I had just started back school for an associate degree in business and wasn’t sure if I could do it,” says Lance. "I really think finishing the half marathon changed me. When my self-esteem was low, I had a hard time following things from start to finish. But I didn't drop out of school [she earned her degree last year] and now I hope to get a bachelor's degree in finance.

“I learned to fight against my illness.”

- Tammy Faughnan, Union, NJ

In February 1997, Faughnan was diagnosed with Lyme Borreliosis, an inflammatory disease that is normally caused by a stab of a deer tick. The disease and the rigorous antibiotic treatment to treat the disease led them to lose their muscle tone, increased £ 35 and had to endure weakening arthritis, headache and overwhelming fatigue.

“I basically lost control of my body,” she says. “It was a rude awakening when my body wasn’t functioning the way I wanted it to.”

Faughnan attended Body Confident in hopes of learning healthy strategies for dealing with the disease. “Before the program, my body image was poor,” she recalls. "I had to do something - even though the weight gain was only part of how I viewed my body. It wasn't the main factor; getting through each day was being able to move my arms and legs and functioning in daily life."

At Body Confident, Faughnan learned how to take baby steps to get back into exercise. "At one point I thought, 'If I can only walk one block, why bother?'" she says. Then one morning, while walking with the group, she was encouraged to simply move within her limits rather than try too hard or, worse, give up altogether.

She took the advice to heart. "Right when he was diagnosed with Lyme disease, my husband and I went to the shore. I couldn't walk, so he just parked the car by the water," she says. “A year later, after Body Confident, when we went again, I walked down the promenade, four miles, and it brought tears to my eyes.

“With the support of the other women in the group, I learned not to strive for the body I had at 21, but simply to have a healthy body at 40,” she says. “Body Confident made me realize how much control I have over my life and my body despite the illness.”

"I learned to listen to my husband."

- Chandra Cowen, Carmel, Ind.

"A few years ago I felt the same way about my body as I do now. Physically, there are things I would like to achieve," says Cowen. “But as far as the inside and how I feel – that’s what’s changed the most.”

The past few years have made enormous personal changes in Cowen's family. In 1997 a family of the family died in a car accident. During the mourning process, Cowen found that she listened to her husband more in tense moments instead of quickly getting angry as she used to be - a skill that she worked hard on.

Cowen's new approach owes in part to Kearney-Cooke's guidance in group sessions. "Body Confident helped me communicate better with my husband, and now I let him get things off his chest," she says. “It helps me because I don’t get stressed out assuming he’s mad at me.”

Fewer relationship struggles have made Cowen a calmer person who is in control of how she feels when things go wrong. “Now I have other options when I'm stressed, like spending time with my kids, riding my bike or gardening, which gives me a tremendous sense of pride and accomplishment.

“Exercise helps too,” she reflects. "I'm not exactly where I want to be [with my weight], but inside I feel a lot better. I've grown a lot."